Please give me some advice
To help me you'll need some information about me.
I'm Turkish. My whole family are Muslims. We are pretty religious but not my dad. Except there's a problem. I don't really believe in god. And to be honest, I don't know if I ever did. No one knows except my siblings and they don't believe in god either.
I'm currently 14 years old. Since I was 7 I've been going to this mosque called Fatih Cami. Every Sunday the people at the mosque come pick us up and bring us there. We learn about Islam stuff for a few hours then they bring us back home. As I got older the people convinced my parents to send me to their summer program which is one month long and cost 300 dollars. You basically just live in a small crappy house with 20 other girls for a month in an overly Islamic environment. I went for two summers, and I hated it a lot. I cried everyday single day and the women there came to hate me. Now the people have convinced my parents to make me live at the mosque and turn me into a Hoca (Islamic teacher). I have to live there for 3 years and undergo training and then they have to send me to Turkey for additional training over there.
Here's the problem. I don't want to be a Hoca. My parents are forcing me. I'll NEVER cover my head or wear a skirt. I refuse to become a stereotypical pathetic Muslim woman. I don't want to be there when I can be in the comfort of my own home. They drop you off at school and pick you up. But you have NO freedom. Can't go outside. Go on the internet. Have a phone. Take a shower whenever you want. Listen to music. Go to bed when you feel like it. Eat when you feel like it. Wake up when you feel like it. Say what you want. Dealing with the snotty Turkish girls there is another problem. You have to do schoolwork and religious work. How can I possibly focus on school work when there is also religious work? Learning all this stuff will be useless to me and waste many years of my life and stall my education.
I've been crying for hours nonstop but my parents don't care. My eyes burn, my face is red, and I have a headache. I don't want to bother my friends again with my religion problems. My parents keep telling me that I they're doing it so we don't burn in hell and because I need to learn my religion better. I know that they just want the best for me but I'm sick of hearing that from everyone. I've been going to the dumb ass mosque for 7 years already and I've been had enough.
So... May I please have some advice on what I can possibly do to avoid going there..? Or some tips on how to stay happy when i'm there? Or... Idk.. Something that will make me see it as good thing instead of the worst thing that ever happened to me. Thank you.
BTW I'll never tell my parents that I'm a non believer. It'll just ruin my life.
12 Comments • Newest first
Thank you everyone for your advice whether it was serious or not but my dad keeps nagging me to go to bed. I'll try to make my parents feel guilty about what they are doing, but I don't think they will change their minds.
You must believe in Allah, and do the 5 pillars of Islam
Well you won't be living with your parents forever..and they can't force you to do religious work. If you have to go there not matter what, you could tell them that you need to focus on your schoolwork.
Convert to Christianity or atheism? You can be actually a strong independent women with those religions....
[quote=Userious]now that makes things somewhat easier.
Use media and make a big deal out of it and make them feel guilty and withdraw their opinion.[/quote]
Alright. I've been trying to make them feel guilty by not talking to them and yelling at them. I've also told my best friend who is Turkish to tell her mom to talk to my mom about it.
Tell them you've been secretly reading the Bible. Tell them you've had a Christian Revelation!
See what happens. God will protect you!
But yeah, try to tough it out for a few more years get the hell outta there unless your parents can somehow compromise with you
If you live in the United States, you shouldn't have a problem because your dad doesn't seem to be that extreme.
If you live in a more extreme nation, it may become a problem.
If your father isn't very traditional, I'd talk to him about this.
I'm in New York not Turkey. And I'm going there in two weeks.
1 Question: how the f.k do you still have internet?
You're pretty much screwed
[quote=tutifruit] one month long and cost 300 dollars.[/quote]
I cannot tell if you're serious, Turkey uses the Turkish lira. Anyways, you should ask your parents as to why they are making you do this. If they cannot find a reasonable answer, use that as leverage as part of your argument of why not to go. Hope that helps, and good luck.