General

Some girls get along better with guys, and hence, have more guy friends. I think it's perfectly fine, to be honest. Sure, I'd be jealous if I had a boyfriend who hanged out with a lot of girls, but it's unfair of me to judge who he makes friends with and get between them. Maybe your bf could get to know your friends, so he would feel more at ease?

@ModernWarfare3: Well now you know the situation =P

[quote=ModernWarfare3]He's a bum you shouldn't be going out with him, he can't support you in the future. Unless you have kids/he already somehow has a good job.
I'm not 1 to judge though.[/quote]

Excuse me, you're not one to judge? There was a WHOLE lot of judgement in that post. First of all, I can support myself. Second of all, he can support himself too. Third of all, he comes from a poor family and cannot afford college. In the meantime he pays the mortgage for his unemployed mom while his rich father is kickin back in Florida and refusing to pay child support. =.= He pays for literally every aspect of his life - car, gas, insurance, phone, everything. He finds a way to make it work. College isn't right for everyone and it does not in any way imply that someone is a bum or has no future.

Weird.. I your in the same situation as my ex.. but anyways try not to sleep over that's stepping out of bounds (same thing how would you like it if he slept over at a females house). Other than that just make sure you have time for him. every thing else is fine though cept having male room mates but they have been your friend for years so it shouldnt be a problem.

[quote=nietsrevliS]Hanging out with Guy friends is nothing out of the norm for me and does not bother me at all
i mean we have had friends before our relationship that were of both sexes so i can deal with that

i have been in enough bars with my guy friends to know what happens when you bring a girl "thats a friend" one of two things happen
1. everyone has a merry good ol time
2. every dude tries hitting on her
my GF is not of legal age to drink so if she was in a bar with other guys i would be concerned [i mean i dont even give her some of my drink when we are at dinner lol] im a stickler on rules ><

if we are dating and then she gets a roomate with some guys i would be very concerned, i wouldnt like it and i would express it openly
i would probably make a very large deal with the Bar/Apartment one more then just say going to the movies/hangout kind of thing

i trust my GF but some things put me on the edge regardless
and the next 4 years of my life im going to have to put more faith into trust[/quote]

That's a very reasonable and helpful perspective, thank you.

@ModernWarfare3 My bf is the same age as me (well 5 months older). He just chose not to go to college.

People always have their own friends when going into a relationship, who am I to tell them that they can't see them anymore (regardless of their gender)?

[quote=ModernWarfare3]If it's awkward you shouldn't be with the guys or with ur bf he should be someone you can experience anything with, and if the guys you hang out with act weird, ur bf is a guy he'd probably get it.[/quote]

Ok sorry, here's what I meant by it being awkward. I'm in college, my boyfriend is not. I go over to a specific fraternity a lot to do problem sets with 2 people in that frat who are in my stats class. If I go over to work on homework and I bring my boyfriend along (he has asked to tag along before), I think that it's a really awkward situation because I'm going over there to do homework and my boyfriend clearly wouldn't have anything to do =/ I'd be happy to introduce him to the people I do homework with but I feel it would be weird if I just brought him with to a study group when he's not even in school >.<

ho, ho, ho.

Coed sleepovers as in staying up all night talking or gaming and crashing there instead of going home. Or I guess at parties when nobody is able to drive home. But I don't drink at parties when my boyfriend isn't there.

And yes, I do look for chances to introduce my boyfriend to the guys I hang out with. By no means do I try to hide them from him. There are just some situations where it would be really awkward for me to bring him along xP

@xenspyder I wouldn't get back with her, you're just going to get hurt again.

@AnnaDragon: Honestly, I believe in 'Once a cheater, always a cheater'. What will change when you two get back together? If I'm presuming correctly, she wouldn't be one to change her ways, so nothing would change. You'd be in the same pickle as before, the question whether you can trust her or not. There's a reason why people who broke up shouldn't get back together.

On topic: I'd have the BF meet said friends and get acquainted at the very least so he knows for himself that they aren't bad people. Even if he's your boyfriend you have to set a line between naively following his wishes and being defiant. Both extremes would do the relationship no good. Make sure he's capable of respecting your life and your decisions. If he doesn't, then maybe it's time you broke it up or solved that problem.

Though to be honest, co-ed sleepovers might be a little much, as is living with a male roommate. The former would be a little jerk-like, since you're agreeing to go. Living with a roommate might be necessary to pay bills, etc.

[quote=Bninga]Wow thats kinda bad....[/quote]

I wasn't saying that I've DONE this stuff, I just wanted to hear people's opinions and personal experience >.<

Well, if the girl and guys are trustworthy people then no, I wouldn't really mind.
But if they are both touchy-feely with each other, then I would be concerned.

Betches be crazy! Just sayin.
It'll be okay if she had a guy friend, but going to sleepovers with multiple guys there > Hell no.

[quote=AnnaDragon]Kinda off topic, but I have an (ex)girlfriend that I dumped cause she cheated on me twice. She wants to get back together again. If we were to, and same situation as the OP said, should she be able to hang out with guy friends.[/quote]

Let me give you a bit of advice. You don't have to take it but I know a lot of cheaters male/female. You can try and tell her not to hang out with guy friends but she will do it behind your back/lie to you about it. So there really is no stopping her even if you tell her not to. I was in you situation trust me I know what I am talking about. Also once a cheater always a cheater. Clearly she did it twice whats to stop her from doing it a third time? She has no morals obviously and the law won't stop her. Her feelings for you didn't stop her the first 2 times. She will cheat again bro. Just give it time. There is nothing to stop her from doing it again. You have three options. Either get back together try and make her not hang with boyfriends and get played like a fool. Option 2 is get back with her trust her and get played like a fool hard. Or option 3 grow a pair kick her to the curb and find someone that is deserving of your feelings and dedication.

[quote=DragonBandit]@muffmallow they act passive cause they don't care your in a relationship! Imo your boyfriend is an awesome guy for trusting you. I hope you don't disappoint him. Anyways I personally would tell the girl off if she ever had a co-ed sleep over. Then break up with her. If she lived with another guy I would again tell her off/break up with her. Although I would never date a girl that had a male room mate. It says a lot about her character. Going out to bars and having/making guy friends is cool. I am not a total nazi. However you know I expect there to be boundary lines. You know like not hanging out with them all the time. Not texting them all the time. Not going back to their apartments. Etc/etc also no lying I can't stand lying. That's an automatic bye bye.[/quote]

Oh, I meant living in an apartment with not just one guy but multiple other people, some of which may be guys. He gets more skeptical when I hang out 1on1 with people but I only do that when I'm having heart to heart conversations xD I'm very honest though and I tell my boyfriend when guys say questionable things to me. I'm also very very very loyal and would never cheat on anyone... Yeh the vibe I'm getting is that this aspect of my relationship is very reasonable xD I guess a lot of people I know are much more liberal/free-spirited on this issue (to the point where I can't tell how much they're really into the relationship)...

sleep over with the other guys uhmm.. i wouldn't like that if my gf would do that, but just going out with other guys is like never a problem?

Kinda off topic, but I have an (ex)girlfriend that I dumped cause she cheated on me twice. She wants to get back together again. If we were to, and same situation as the OP said, should she be able to hang out with guy friends.

well as long as you don't spend more time with your male friends than you do with your boyfriend

@muffmallow they act passive cause they don't care your in a relationship! Imo your boyfriend is an awesome guy for trusting you. I hope you don't disappoint him. Anyways I personally would tell the girl off if she ever had a co-ed sleep over. Then break up with her. If she lived with another guy I would again tell her off/break up with her. Although I would never date a girl that had a male room mate. It says a lot about her character. Going out to bars and having/making guy friends is cool. I am not a total nazi. However you know I expect there to be boundary lines. You know like not hanging out with them all the time. Not texting them all the time. Not going back to their apartments. Etc/etc also no lying I can't stand lying. That's an automatic bye bye.

Woops forgot to answer the question. The first thought that runs through my mind is "she is cheating".

I trust my girlfriend. Honestly though, I can't say that I wouldn't be bothered at all. I think everyone has that little insecurity about their significant other spending time with people of the opposite gender, even if it's just friends.

BUT! Without trust, what is there?

[quote=v1nd1ct1on]my best friend's gf is my best girly friend, he's fine with it... just be sure the guys you're going out with don't have a crush on you, you'll be fine [/quote]

Some things you just can't control, yanno? ;P

It's not like I'm flirty or anything. And yeah, my bf says that if he's met the guys then he feels better about it... He trusts me, he just doesn't trust other guys >.< Even with my best friends from home he gets a little anxious when it's all of them and just me, even though I've known em for like 6 years... but I guess he doesn't really know them all that well (my friends don't make much effort to be friendly to him - they're not mean but they don't act welcoming, just passive)

It's all a matter of trust, but i think it's important to let your BF meet the guys you're hanging out with, they shouldn't be invisible to him.
(well, i don't know if he already met them, but anyway)