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My sisters boyfriend is a sick guy

So I've got this sister named Annie who recently started going out with this random guy. Right from the start I could tell there was something up with him. He seemed...off. Anyway so last night she and I went to his house for dinner. He wasn't home when we arrived, but the door was unlocked, so we let ourselves in. We sat in his living room and waited a while, but I got bored and decided to look around the house. I went into one room upstairs and I find him, sitting there, covering himself in talcum powder. There's literally powder everywhere. I ask him what in the hell he's doing. Says he's getting ready for dinner, that he likes his skin baby soft. He asks me to touch his chest and it's like freaking silk. He gets dressed and we both head down to dinner. It's great, and my sister and him start to flirt, so I leave to give them some privacy. About an hour later I'm back at home, and there's banging on my door. It's my sister. She's beaten up like hell so I ask her what happened. She tells me her boyfriend has some talcum powder fetish and that when she said it was weird he got violent. And that apparently he goes around town stealing bottles of the stuff and hasn't been caught. This guy is crazy. He's a thief. He's a brute. My sister starts to break down from shock and starts asking me what happened. I look at her and ask, "Annie, are you okay? So, Annie are you okay? Are you okay Annie?" "You've been hit by...you've been struck by...a smooth criminal!"

October 15, 2012

40 Comments • Newest first

BlueColt

[quote=ChildsPlay]Because the mods moved it out of Chat?[/quote]

*facepalm* I mean the thread doesn't relate to the section it's in... I don't care who moved it or what happened to it. This should be in chat. I repeat, why is this in the fun section?

Reply October 21, 2012
ChildsPlay

[quote=BlueColt]And this is in the fun section, why?[/quote]
Because the mods moved it out of Chat?

Reply October 21, 2012
BlueColt

And this is in the fun section, why?

Reply October 18, 2012
Collateral

Thanks for the laugh

Reply October 15, 2012
JamesInNinja

I didn't even catch on to this.. Damn it's too late.

Reply October 15, 2012
MyOracle

I hope she doesn't change her name to Billie Jean and stalk random men saying shes preggs

Reply October 15, 2012 - edited
trashed

I read the last sentence before I read the story and gave it away for myself...

Reply October 15, 2012 - edited
Barquifa

[quote=HotAir]BOOMER SOONERS![/quote]

OU pride!

Reply October 15, 2012 - edited
OldManMaple

[quote=Barquifa]3/10 saw it coming a mile away.

old type of pasta.[/quote]

the other 7/10 think this really happened.

Reply October 15, 2012 - edited
Barquifa

3/10 saw it coming a mile away.

old type of pasta.

Reply October 15, 2012 - edited
OldManMaple

Yeah on your end lol!
On my end? "Since when did American's become so slow witted?" o.o

Reply October 15, 2012 - edited
Gee187

@ChildsPlay: Well played madam, I enjoyed this quite a bit. Thanks for that entertainment

Reply October 15, 2012 - edited
ChildsPlay

[quote=OldManMaple]No, just bothered by the people who don't understand what you're saying.[/quote]
But that's half the amusement.

Reply October 15, 2012 - edited
OldManMaple

No, just bothered by the people who don't understand what you're saying.

Reply October 15, 2012 - edited
ChildsPlay

[quote=OldManMaple]*facedesk*
*enters a pleasant coma*
*do not disturb*[/quote]
You are now disturbed.

Reply October 15, 2012 - edited
OldManMaple

*facedesk*
*enters a pleasant coma*
*do not disturb*

Reply October 15, 2012 - edited
MagicStarz

It was even on the news http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RWdGIbZKtmg

Reply October 15, 2012 - edited
Laker1294

That's awful. I'm sorry for what happened. I'm sure not all guys are like this. I would know because I have guy friends and every guy is different.

Reply October 15, 2012 - edited
mike3110

[quote=dracox5234]0/10 for you, because that was some good stuff.

9/10 for story, didn't see that coming.
I thought he would turn out to be one of those men who like to dress up as babies for a fetish or something.[/quote]

You aren't even OP, and got butthurt.

Cool.

Reply October 15, 2012 - edited
ChildsPlay

[quote=LightingFrag]So apparently everyone on basilmarket has no friends, okay[/quote]
I'm glad we're on the same page now.

Reply October 15, 2012 - edited
dracox5234

[quote=mike3110]Expected Bel-air'd, received garbage. 0/10 OP.
Wasn't even a good read.[/quote]
0/10 for you, because that was some good stuff.

9/10 for story, didn't see that coming.
I thought he would turn out to be one of those men who like to dress up as babies for a fetish or something.

Reply October 15, 2012 - edited
fun2killu

bf = smooth poser

Reply October 15, 2012 - edited
msgm

Wait, is this serious or just a pretty good Michael Jackson reference?

Reply October 15, 2012 - edited
ChildsPlay

[quote=PortraitOfRuin]Where's the part where we all walk the dinosaur and spaghetti flies out of our pockets?[/quote]
It's in the next chapter.

Reply October 15, 2012 - edited
PortraitOfRuin

Where's the part where we all walk the dinosaur and spaghetti flies out of our pockets?

Reply October 15, 2012 - edited
Fiercerain

That's so sickening to read... I hope she's safe from him if they release him.

Reply October 15, 2012 - edited
ChildsPlay

[quote=LightingFrag]Tldr: Ts has no friends[/quote]
You're on basilmarket. You have no right to talk.

Reply October 15, 2012 - edited
mike3110

Expected Bel-air'd, received garbage. 0/10 OP.
Wasn't even a good read.

Reply October 15, 2012 - edited
SwiggleBlade

SO.. how bout them Texans..

Reply October 15, 2012 - edited
ChildsPlay

[quote=zoneflare2]So is this why youre hating on men right now? o.o[/quote]
Yeah. All you men are so evil. And my story is so legit.

Reply October 15, 2012 - edited
Braviary

Soft skin is hot.

Reply October 15, 2012 - edited
monsterzexion

[quote=sohee]nice[/quote]

Your avatar and comment made this whole thread funny.

Reply October 15, 2012 - edited
ChildsPlay

[quote=Adele]where was the police[/quote]
She came home right after it happened I guess. We ended up calling the 911 after she started breaking down and her boyfriend is in custody now. Sick bastard.

Reply October 15, 2012 - edited
radkai

Guy maaad smoooth.

Reply October 15, 2012 - edited
DColdhearts

That's cool.

Reply October 15, 2012 - edited
EggTree

good one

Reply October 15, 2012 - edited
sohee

nice

Reply October 15, 2012 - edited