Feelings of unfulfillment
Everything in my life is going well, presumably (got my college degree, working at a comfy desk job making decent money), but what's this feeling of emptiness and unfulfillment? When I was younger, a simple ride in the car with my father listening to classic British rock was bliss but now I'm deadpan even when a close friend has a huge bachelor party with an open bar and is expected to be a fun night.
What do I need to do to get that sense of fulfillment I had when I was a kid? Is this just a rite of passage of getting older? If these feelings are exacerbated the older I get, I don't know how anyone can ever have birthday parties commemorating another year closer to the grave. Everything seems pedestrian. Going out and drinking and partying doesn't nearly have the same appeal compared to when I was 18.
Maybe I need to find a new hobby.. Or maybe I need to change my mindset and recalibrate it so I'm thankful and grateful for the things I do have and realize I'm fortunate enough to even express these thoughts of apathy. God, I'm sure a bunch of people out there would kill to live the life I'm living, but that thought just makes me feel worse that I'm unenthusiastic about everything.
So chat, how do you guys deal with feelings of unfulfillment?
15 Comments • Newest first
I think you essentially gotten complacent with your life. I don't think it's a matter of being grateful (though you should be), but rather not exploring the other things that are out there.
As someone pointed out, you could look for a hobby. I would ask, what is it that makes you excited in life? Did you ever wanted to travel in life? Do you ever want to try different kinds of foods? Do you ever want to learn or see something with your own eyes? What makes you excited/ what makes you tick and are you expanding your horizons on those frontiers as time goes on?
While a job is a job, an example I used with a friend was: If you were paid a good amount to sit still in a chair for 8 hours a day while staying quiet and prohibited in doing anything else, would you feel satisfied? In my opinion, regardless of what people are doing, people feel satisfied doing they do things that are meaningful to them that is worth the time and effort.
@byesandtowbys: hahahaha wow that must be from so long ago and why do you even have that saved anyways?
@byesandtowbys: semi-old basil layout...the feels
https://i.imgur.com/vxvnGAi.png
Maybe look into making a project car (shrug)
Maybe you just need to try new things. Life is all about variety. If you keep doing the same thing over and over it becomes routine and it doesn't excite you anymore, at least that's how I feel. So try to be different and do something different every now and then. It also sounds like you need something to aim for as well, so maybe set yourself some short and long term goals to strive for. For example, my short term goal is to learn japanese and visit Japan over the next couple of years. My long term goal is to become a savvy investor so I can retire early.
@sujay: I think what you said about other people is really important. Sometimes we all forget how lucky we are, especially me. My life isn't perfect, but I got lucky and got good stats when I rolled the dice at the login screen.
you said it yourself; it's really a matter of perspective. sometimes it's just important to understand that a lot of people would kill to be where you're at. get some fresh air, catch up with some friends; you'll be fine.
It seems you got your basics straight.
Assuming you are a man, you need a hobby which leaves something to look at, a monument of your achievement if you will.
We men need to do shït which result on something we can look back and say: "yep, this is how far I have gone with life"
Learn to craft/build stuff
Be it customizing/fixing your car, building a PC, making custom furniture out of wood, tools for the house, learn to cook complex stuff, etc.
play maple
@soulblade: I'm starting to think this is exactly the case. When I was younger, I had goals I wanted to reach- get a high GPA, get into a good school, get a good job, get a girlfriend etc. Now, I just live and don't have any particular apex I want to reach.
Don't get me wrong, I'm not depressed or anything; I enjoy my life for what it is and I still have fun doing certain things. It's just this lingering feeling of unfulfillment that makes me crazy.
i think of the simplest thing, walking, i just walk blocks and listen to music, and watch as the whole world pass by.
Maybe you need a goal to work towards
I was a D1 college athlete so I'd say I'm fairly fit. I eat healthy, I mealprep at least a week in advance most of the time. I go to the gym every night on weekdays and my weekends are off days/cheat days. I work, I make money, I use my money on things I enjoy, I contribute to society, etc.
I have a good group of friends since high school and still keep in touch with a lot of people from my graduating class in college.
I live with my girlfriend so sex life is well, yeah it's good. Not perfect but we're both into each other so I'd say it's about as good of a sex life as you can get.
Are you a man or a woman?
How old are you?
Got your basics sorted up?; Diet, fitness, etc.
How's your sex life? (Brownie points if u got the reference)