I think I messed up
So, there's this girl I like, and we've been hanging out a lot lately (not alone, just at group events). I've always extended myself out to her in attempting to show her that I like her, and she hasn't noticed yet. And, yesterday, she said she couldn't go to a group event on saturday due to her going somewhere and that she felt really bad. I told her it was all good and everyone would understand, but after that she said, "We should hang out when I get back though!" and then suggested that we go to the park on the following saturday.
After she said that, I was confused of whether she meant the group or just myself. So, in a half-panic I said that going to the park would be awesome, and said that I could try to get everyone to reschedule and wait for her so that we call could hang out the following saturday.
She then said, "Nah we could just hang out next saturday." And, me, still being confused on whether she meant just me, or the entire group of friends, I said, "Okay! Who do you want to go?"
Thats^ where I felt I truly screwed up, I thought about it, and realized she may have been truly extending out to me for the first time, and was trying to hang out alone. Now, I'm sitting here trying to figure out something to say to fix this, and accept the extension rather than being scared of the answer and bringing friends into the equation by letting her know that I would love to hang out with her at the park, as I may get a chance to show her my feelings for her. But, the problem is, I need to think of something to say to fix this.
TDLR: A girl I like finally extended out to me in asking me to (i think) hang out 1 on 1 with me, and I may have blew my chance to do it, as I freaked out and in a panic, asked who else she wanted to be there, as if I was scared of what she was going to say. Now I need to find something to say to her that lets her know that I want to hang out with her 1 on 1, and let her know my feelings for her, and that I dont want anyone else there with us.
19 Comments • Newest first
Send her this song
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jEy6MGu3bIA
@Telatsu You sir are someone who knows what they're talking about.
@dubmason Man, from the convo you showed us on the first page I get a weird vibe from it, she comes across as very cold. Does she usually respond like that? She might not be interested in you just judging by that short snippet of convo, you seem to be the one carrying the convo and what you say to her is all energetic/happy and she responds very dull and boring.
Also, just a future tip. Try and cut back on the emoticons when talking to girls, don't say things like "xD, D:, :O" etc, and try to keep the exclamation marks to a minimum. Because it can come across as too needy like you're constantly trying to please her.
@ILikeAnime: I'm prepared Im aware of what could happen and im prepared for both sides. Thanks for all the help guys
[quote=dubmason]@gangar32: Alright, thanks I talked to her and she meant the whole group So its still unknown how she feels about me, but im just glad I didn't blow my chance. Ill just have to wait and see what happens [/quote]
Not to demotivate you but be prepared for more hardships later.
@gangar32: Alright, thanks I talked to her and she meant the whole group So its still unknown how she feels about me, but im just glad I didn't blow my chance. Ill just have to wait and see what happens
@dubmason
Work it into conversation today, then. It's not a time sensitive statement. Just do something to the effect of, "I was thinking about our convo yesterday, and since it's hard to get everyone together I'm totally okay with just us two hanging if that's cool with you."
It's simple really. Just talk to her about it. Or arrange something else where just you and her hang out. Like say you have fun talking with her and ask if she'd like to hang out. You don't have to make it like a date or anything, just something fun that doesn't really require a lot of people. Maybe not a movie though. Movies are great and all, as they give you something to talk about afterwards, but during the actual movie you just sit in silence, so you don't get much conversation.
[quote=ILikeAnime]You call that a screw up? You could've simply asked: "only the two of us"?[/quote]
My mistake is that I didn't ask that, and that I want to let her know I want to go to the park with just her. My mistake was that I gave off the mood that I didn't because I started getting nervous and freaked out and accidentally said what I said without thinking D:
good job, now you learn after your mistakes.
You call that a screw up? You could've simply asked: "only the two of us"?
@dubmason: but you wanted to ask her who els she want to join, thats why u did asked her that, instead of asking her out.
Go to the get together with all your friends, but then look for every excuse to be alone with her.
[quote=pr3stig3]What did she say when you asked her who else she wanted to go to the park with? Did she mention anyone else? If she did, tell your friend everything so he'll understand and have him let you go to the park alone with her. If she never responded, then just go to the park alone with her. Tell her you wanted to talk to her without having everyone else around.[/quote]
I asked who she wanted to go twice in different situations, it went like this,
Her: "But we should hang when I get back!"
"What time are you going to the park on saturday?" (The saturday shes talking about is the group event, not the saturday after)
Me: "Hmmm, ill ask! "
"They're all saying 12-ish to 1! Does that work for you? Or will you be gone by then?"
Her: "I'm leaving friday. And I'll be back sunday sometime in the afternoon" (Of the same week of the first group event on saturday)
Me: "Awh! D: So you won't be able to make it? I could like, try to make them wait till you get back or something "
Her: "Nah we can just hang next weekend"
Me: "Alright! So should I let them know you'll be at the grand canyon?"
Her: "Sure haha"
Me: "Alright! And as for hanging out next weekend, where would you want to go? And who would you want to go? I could get it all organized XD"
(Here's where I feel I screwed up, due to her response and me finally realizing what she may have tried to say)
Her: "Um everyone from the hangout last weekend I guess lol"
She responded as if she was getting more disappointed every message I sent T-T
What did she say when you asked her who else she wanted to go to the park with? Did she mention anyone else? If she did, tell your friend everything so he'll understand and have him let you go to the park alone with her. If she never responded, then just go to the park alone with her. Tell her you wanted to talk to her without having everyone else around.
[quote=Telatsu]Just follow up casually and say, "Although I'm more than fine with it just being us two hanging out. Whatever you're comfortable with."
This way you at least show a minimal interest in being with her alone as well as not overstating the fact you would like it to be just you two. Easily negating your previous mistake with no backtracking.[/quote]
This would've been the best thing to say by far, but my dilemma is that I said this yesterday, and I'm attempting to fix this today
Just follow up casually and say, "Although I'm more than fine with it just being us two hanging out. Whatever you're comfortable with."
This way you at least show a minimal interest in being with her alone as well as not overstating the fact you would like it to be just you two. Easily negating your previous mistake with no backtracking.
[quote=Rondragon123]tell her that by saying "who els you want to come with us?" u meant to say "who els you want to come with us? because i want only us 2" though that would be lieing to her but that can work out.[/quote]
I do only want it to be us two, It wouldn't be lying if I told her that
tell her that by saying "who els you want to come with us?" u meant to say "who els you want to come with us? because i want only us 2" though that would be lieing to her but that can work out.
tell her if she want to eat some tofu burger with u
You sir, Need to take your time while talking to females. You jumped the gun. And it shot chew in da face.