My life is a screwed up plot. Serious question.
Long story: I don't know what to say anymore. I'm 12 years old and this happens.
Today is Christmas Eve, as we all know. I go to my uncle's house, we exchange presents, whatever.
My mom, however, is the one person that shows up late for everything, and she showed up four hours late. That is caused by her family-diagnosed A.D.D, because she can't really focus on more than one thing at a time. She also is addicted to perscription medications and ciggarettes (she's been smoking for 36 years). Oh well.
My dad and I talk about some stuff, books I got, etc. Then, he says something... "Jar... I have a serious question. I don't really think I should bring it up, but I will anyway."
I patiently wait until he brings it up.
My dad says, "How would you feel is Mom went away for a few months."
My heart drops. "Plot twist," I announce. He chuckles, then continues, "to Rehab. We both know about her problems, and it isn't getting better. I'm thinking she'll have a nervous breakdown, not to mention her A.D.D... she is a good worker, but she can't focus. She's enthusiatic, but that won't pay off if she can't think about one thing..."
Another thing, my parents fight alot. It has became violent four or five times, but verbal yelling is frequent. My dad says that I shouldn't have to witness this.
I said I was fine with it, since she'll hopefully get better while there.
My dad adds, "Since she just recently got a job, though, and the job market isn't in the best shape. Plus, she's in home-sales, so that isn't an easy thing to get back into during this recession. We can't really afford her losing her job..."
I say "then wait until the job market gets better", but then realize she's about a month away from a nervous breakdown, and my dad and I both know I understood that.
I really don't know what to do. I want her to go, but I then think about the long-term effects it may have, and plus my dad works 5 and a half days a week, so what would I do? My mom was always there to take care of me when things went wrong.
But on the bright side, she'll be better, more focused, and be ready to secure a job... but after 3 months of being away. Gah...
I sort-of began to tear imagining this potential scenario. The car was dark, so my dad didn't see that...
SHORT STORY: My dad and family are thinking about sending my mom to rehab. I'm thinking about all the negative effects, but really about the positive.
So, I ask you, basil.
What should I do?
Is it time to mature... time to grow away from my mom?
4 Comments • Newest first
Tough decision. I really don't know what to tell you. Rehab works for some, and doesn't for others. You also have the chance of her loosing her job, going to rehab, and evidently not recovering. She should probably go to rehab, though. Her A.D.D. sounds more dangerous than usual. Personally, my father has been addicted to pills for about 12 years now and he's been to rehab 6 times and has not recovered. Just putting that out there.
Do what's best. She's still a human being and ultimately your mother.
Thanks for all your help, guys...
She doesn't know that we might plan this, but her entire side of the family and my dad talked about this behind my back apparently.
I don't know what to do.
Merry Christmas, everyone.
I feel for you, but you don't have to for me. My mom's dead. It hurts for a while, and it leaves in little pieces. But it will be better when she comes back, because you will always know that she will.
Not loving your mother is not synonymous with maturity; I hope you realize that. You're never too old to appreciate all that your mother has done for you. But if you love her, then maybe it's for the best if she went through it.