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This girl took April Fools too far

My roommate put gum and whipped cream and olive oil in my brand new GTX 750 TI graphics card. (cost $150) Obviously it doesn't work anymore.
I'm just glad nothing else in my computer was broken...yet.

What should I do to her?

April 2, 2014

27 Comments • Newest first

NoNsensical

Kill her, barbeque the body. I heard human tastes like pork.

Reply April 2, 2014
Errr

@East: Sorry, just skimmed through the comment.

Reply April 2, 2014
AsianPeople

[quote=evonexus]Isn't there some unspoken rule about how money is supposed to circulate between guys and girls? I wouldn't really know lol, you tell me.[/quote]

Not really. There is an unspoken rule of "don't destroy other people's property", though.

Reply April 2, 2014
AsianPeople

[quote=evonexus]assuming you're a girl, just ask her to pay you back.[/quote]

How would OP being male change the situation?

Reply April 2, 2014
ehnogi

Point a gun to her head and tell her to say her prayers.
When she thinks that it's an April Fool's joke, riddle her jacket with bullets and point the gun right back at her.
When she starts to break down crying, that's when you go "APRIL FOOLS BIIIIAATCHHH"

Reply April 2, 2014
GreatBolshy

rather than break her things like everyone suggested, just pawn her stuff until you get $150 back. she'll be out around 500 bucks but you'll have your new card

Reply April 2, 2014
CathySenpai

cut her....jacket, or make her life hell

Reply April 2, 2014
East

@Errr: Well when someones asks to take you out to dinner, it implies that the asker is paying so yeah...

Reply April 2, 2014
Quasar

Just a reminder that two wrongs don't make a right, so don't get revenge by destroying her property which can cause a long cycle of revenge and that can cause some serious trouble.

Reply April 2, 2014 - edited
Jenknee

I don't think destroying her stuff would be any good.
Honestly, just talk to her and see what happens.. if she refuses to pay you back then i would take legal actions

Reply April 2, 2014 - edited
Errr

[quote=East]Say you'll take her out for dinner(drive her there too)
Order the most expensive thing on the menu
Say "brb bathroom"
Go to parking lot, drive home, and laugh. HAHAHA

-Make sure its place pretty isolated from public transportation
-She has to pay the bill[/quote]

Or you could tell her you're paying and that she can leave her money at home, unless you really just want her to spend a bunch of money.

Reply April 2, 2014 - edited
AsianPeople

You should assault her like everyone here is saying. That will surely improve the situation.

Or, maybe you should talk to your roommate and take legal/other action if they are not willing to apologize and repay you for the destruction of your property.

Reply April 2, 2014 - edited
Midget

slice off one of her nipples and gorilla glue it to her forehead

Reply April 2, 2014 - edited
peterisnoob

Maybe you can RMA it
i doubt it though

Reply April 2, 2014 - edited
JekutoNightra

Make her pay you at least half the damage she caused.

Reply April 2, 2014 - edited
East

Say you'll take her out for dinner(drive her there too)
Order the most expensive thing on the menu
Say "brb bathroom"
Go to parking lot, drive home, and laugh. HAHAHA

-Make sure its place pretty isolated from public transportation
-She has to pay the bill

Reply April 2, 2014 - edited
samstergx

tell her to smu

Reply April 2, 2014 - edited
Billionz

Punch her in the face. April Fools!

Reply April 2, 2014 - edited
vincevo

IMO I wouldn't even consider that an "April's Fools" since that's just really cruel things to do >.<

OT: Do something that would even you guys up. Like if she pays you back

Reply April 2, 2014 - edited
meso911

I would sue her for damage to personal property.

Reply April 2, 2014 - edited
icoleslawderp

Punch her in the gut, then push her into a hole full of mud.

Reply April 2, 2014 - edited
Xreniya

[quote=nopaycheck]She has a $300 jacket and I have a pair of scissors. Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm[/quote]

Cut away the left side of it. That's $150 gone
<:

Reply April 2, 2014 - edited
nopaycheck

She has a $300 jacket and I have a pair of scissors. Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

Reply April 2, 2014 - edited
xtripled

1) she pays you back + $50 for being an idiot
2) takes you out for dinner
3) does all the house work for the week

Reply April 2, 2014 - edited
CygnusBabii

Make that hoe pay you back.

Reply April 2, 2014 - edited
KaichouShion

Make her pay it back.
If she doesn't ruin her things worth more than your card. Sending a joke back woo

Reply April 2, 2014 - edited
gotarmaru

You should fake confession and Seduce her.

Reply April 2, 2014 - edited