Lending people moneymost annoying thing ever- need help
Hi there friend.
I'm in need of some advice.
A month ago I went to a concert with a friend and his girlfriend.
It was my idea to go, so I bought the tickets for the three of us, they would pay me back.
The tickets were €29.55 each (IMO not expensive, but not cheap either) but my friend is a cheap ass so before I bought the tickets I asked him if he still wanted to go through with it, so he could still back out if he thought it was to expensive.
He gave me the green light and I bought three tickets.
Fast forward one week and we're at the concert, the concert is great and all, smiles all around, I even got my all-stars signed by the lead-singer (Yay)
We both buy a shirt, buuuuuuuut obviously he didn't bring cash,(come prepared people!) sooooo guess who ends up paying for his shirt :I
Before the day is at an end he owes me close to eighty euro's he says he'll pay ASAP
Fast forward one more week, I'm hanging out with him and I mention he still owes me money.
He tells me, and I quote: Oh yeah, I'll get payed next week, so I'll pay you the €50,- then.
Wait what?! yeah sorry, I don't just forget about €30,- that easily.
So tell him he owes me a bit more than just €50,-
That night I send him a text as a reminder, with a little breakdown of the exact amount he owes me.
(2x 29.55 + 1x 20.00 = 79.10)
Fast forward two(!) more weeks, I hang out with him again, I tell him I really don't want to have to keep asking him.
Finally after more than a month he finally pays me.
€65,- "2x tickets + T-shirt"
WHAT IS YOUR DEAL MAN!
Now here is the real problem, he is actually one of my best friends and I've known him forever.
So what do I do now?
If he wasn't a friend I'd either keep complaining until I'm paid, or just leave it like this and just never do anything for them again.
I'm about 90% sure it isn't just some mistake, I've told him the correct amount countless times.
Plus I send him a text with my bank account info, while looking for that he must have come across the countless texts in which I tell him how much he needs to pay me.
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I'm convinced he's knowingly trying to F*** with me.
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Plus do you really just come up with some arbitrary amount of money if you can't remember the exact amount?
"Yeah €65,- sounds about right" you don't take the extremely little amount of effort to find out the right amount?
I'm planning to confront him when I see him next week, I'll just ask him exactly what he thinks he's doing.
-Do you think I should get less money since I have a job and you don't, so "I don't need the extra €14.10 anyways"?
-Do you really manage your finances that terribly that you absolutely couldn't pay the extra €14.10? you could have told me.
-Did you really forget the proper amount and couldn't be bothered?
-Did you think it was to expensive, was the concert only worth €65,- to you? Yeah that's not how it works.
So yeah Basil, what should I do?
I might be overreacting, but honestly, If I can't trust you with €14.10, then what can I trust you with?
You can't do this to anyone, PAY WHAT IS OWED, and don't even think of messing with your friends.
9 Comments • Newest first
At least he paid the 65 euros which at least shows he made an effort to pay you back (albeit it wasn't the full amount). Me and my friends will pay for each other all the time but we don't expect to be paid back in the exact monetary amount. Sometimes someone will buy a case of beer.. or pay for someone's sushi.. or buy a movie ticket.. etc. It really just depends on the type of relationship you have with this person. If it was me I wouldn't really be making a big deal out of that last 14 euros especially since you're the one who basically offered to buy the tickets and to buy the shirt.. Just learn from this and don't make the mistake again in the future. If you're that concerned about your money then don't be paying for people's stuff.
use splitwise, so that y'all don't need to bicker cus one of you wrote it down and broke down the payments and he'd know exactly what he was paying back. saves the arguments. also, if he's not holding cash there's always venmo or at least i hope so. if you do have it you can request money on the spot and he can pay you when he can. the important thing i think is that the invoice is there.
i feel ya tho. my pockets are always empty at around the beginning of the month because i would cover rent. of course i get paid back eventually. i'm also tryna cover rent NOW and i dont even live in the freakin' place anymore; my name's on the lease so i'm partially responsible. but tbh i dont have enough rn so i'm asking other housemates to chip in cus this b is in korea for the summer and is generally bad at getting back to me. i even told her a week in advance that this was gonna happen and that i would not be able to cover her cus i covered my boo's car insurance and both of us are getting paid this friday so until then i'm broke as a joke aside from my credit card which i can use but not for rent
If he's one of your 'best friends' meh money is just money. The fact that he's like that though, makes me question why you'd have a best friend like that. I have friends I know can't pay me back, so I never ask for it back.
Maybe in the future, just don't lend him money if it's such an issue.
Sue him. And sleep with his gf.
just tlel him hes going to pay you with his body, and then fk him where he really wants it
@revenants: @nolen: @readers: Thanks for the answers!
I'm pretty sure I'll meet him sometime this week, I'll talk about it then.
It all comes down to communication, if you can't pay/don't want to pay/ need a little more time I'm 100% fine with that, as long as you tell me...
What pisses me off is that he put "payment 2x tickets + T-shirt" in the description of the payment, so it's kind of hard to argue this is just a partial payment.
He also didn't send me a text telling me he wired me the money, so I feel like he just hoped I would never really notice it.
I'll try to remain open-minded, he might have been convinced €65 was the right amount, but then he still pisses me off for not double checking things like this. learn to take finances seriously for gods sake.
I realize I'm waaaaaaaay overthinking this, while writing this I just let out all my pent up anger for having to remind someone so many times, I hate that I somehow feel guilty about asking people to pay me while it's my darn right!
Buuuuuuuuuut it would be a waste to ruin a friendship over less than €15 so I'll try to fix this in a reasonable manner!
However if he tries to play me for a fool he can keep the money, €14.10 well spend, since I then know what kind of person I'm dealing with.
Either way, you've turned this relationship with your friend into something else entirely once you started paying for everything for him. Akin to you being a guardian and him being the dependent (or a parent and his/her child).
I would advise you to try to get the money back. Regardless of whether or not you do get it back, don't be friends with this person anymore.
In the US, debt collectors sue before asking questions
Honestly, when he told you he would pay you when he gets paid you should've called or texted that same day. Moreover, since it seems like you got the cash from him a week after he got paid who knows if he already spent all his money on whatever bills he had and just gave the rest he could spare to you? Although I am with you if he's ignoring you over that little amount of cash you should confront him and ask what's up. Inquiring from the other side without assumptions can lead quite a ways without misunderstandings, please confront him but try not to be assumptive. Hopefully everything works out for you guys!