Father and son relationship
Hello Basil
First I want to mention that I am not here to troll.
Me and my father never have been really close. I grew up with my mom while my father lived in another town about 30-45 minutes away. My mom raised me by herself mostly. My father never really came around except for christmas sometimes. I honestly think he did that so my mom wouldnt file for child support but she did in my teenage years anyhow. My father would come around for my birthday on some years though. Once a summer I would get to spend the weekend with him and some years he never showed up to pick me up. On one summer I got to spend a few weeks with him and he wasnt very nice to me. He made me work very hard and would often pick at me. He owned a few sports cars and I guess he thought he was amazing because of that. Anyhow time went on and I graduated high school etc and he showed up at my graduation. I wasn't too sure he would even come to it. Currently I am in college and starting the first of a series of online business's for myself. I tell him about college and business but he doesnt seem like he cares about that. From time to time I call my father and we speak for a few minutes. Overall, I'll keep this short and bring this to a close. I don't think I really owe my father anything. I am just trying to be the bigger person here and maybe salvage something from all this if that is even possible. We are only born once, grow once, live once, and die once. Maybe I am thinking to much into this and should just forget about him. Anyhow basil whats your take on this?
4 Comments • Newest first
If you feel it is harmful for you to keep him in your life, do not feel the need to. Take some time to really reflect on whether or not you want him to be a part of your life.
I think you have a good mother judging from how you try to be nice to you dad. That is a really mature thing to do. I think no matter how he acts he's still your biological father. I wouldn't know how to respond to this or act if I was in your shoes because my relationship with my dad is different (more positive). I agree with others that you don't owe him anything. I hate fathers don't bother raising their children like totally neglect their children both financially and taking an active role in raising them then just come out if the blue and expect everything to be normal. Don't have children if you aren't going to be in their lives. It would be nice if you could forgive him for not being there as much and making up for lost time. He seems to be making an effort to be a good father by coming to your hs graduation. Give him the benefit of a doubt and continue to develop your father and son relationship. Life is short. Make the most of the time we have. All we really need is love.
I appreciate everyones responses.
I'm not close with my either but I at least try and make conversation with him
Don't want to come off as a b**** or anything to him