I would say keep talking to him.You can call, you can go to places with him, you can chat my other means. However, look out and talk to other guys you might be interested in.
I was in the same situation, I met my ex-gf during Ultimate Frisbee. Definitely out of my league; matched GPA with valedictorian, level 8 gymanist at age 10 but teaches kids instead as her job, regional water-skiing contender, and the list goes on and on. I was just pretty into Computer Science and planning to stick to Track for life while she could have seriously gone for the Olympics.
Relationship somehow worked out. We texted pretty occasionally but I was for about 3~ months starting and leading conversations. What you should notice is simply how engaged they are in the conversation like what they say. Another thing, I made my intentions pretty clear. First, compliments and friendly flirting but that didn't last for no longer than two or so weeks(if that lol). Some sort of touching or physical contact is a pretty clear sign too and obvious non-friendly flirting; which is what I did.
However, this is from a guy's point of view. I've rarely seen girls be aggresive towards the opposite sex so I would caution on how straight-forward you are. There's definitely still a stigma on females who are too aggresive too soon but not so much for guys in this century. He should make some sort of notification at some point lol, "you're a girl" - RitoPls. Most guys give some sign of affection towards you if they like you unless there are certain personality traits.
[quote=qtwarriorxx9001][/quote] yeah, probably [quote=WontPostMuch][/quote] thanks for the advice and luck! [quote=RitoPls][/quote] i guess it's good preparation to be a tree in my next life HAHAH [quote=Thiefy996][/quote] LOL no not like a spelling bee it's a bit complicated to explain.. Nearby speech and debate teams from local schools are put together into a "league." Speech competitors go and compete at tournaments hosted by that league, as well as other random ones hosted by schools. There are different events students can compete in at these tournaments, ranging from debates, interpretation, persuasives, improv, etc. At varsity tournaments, there are 2-3 preliminary rounds, one semi-final round, and a final round for each respective event. In each prelim round, 6-7 competitors competing in the same event are randomly matched up. There, they each take a turn in performing their event--they give speeches, act, etc. A judge is assigned to each round to watch the performances and give placings to the competitors; the standard 1st, 2nd, 3rd, and so on. The placings from prelims are then added up to get a cume, or total, for each competitor. The lowest cumes are picked to advance to semi-finals, where people get eliminated for final rounds. In our case, he and I both competed in improv, an event where you're given 3 topics and 2 minutes to prepare a 5 minute speech about one of the topics. We were just coincidentally matched up our first, semi-final, and final rounds, so we were eventually forced to talk to each other, LOL.
Sorry, I didn't elaborate because I didn't really know how to explain it, since it's a bit difficult to explain. Some of this explanation is probably inaccurate too, 'cause I suck at explaining these things. I hope it makes some sense.
Well me and my crush have both told each other we kinda dislike texting. So our conversation can be like that too...taking two hours to reply ya know. Call this guy, ask him out, something. Do something.
@halfway: I don't think he'd change something he's unaware of, though. We were matched up in a round of 6-7 people and I took first that round, while he took second. We were matched up against each other again in semi-finals that same day, and we got the same placing from the two judges. It was a funny coincidence because the judge that gave me first gave him fifth, while the judge that gave me fifth gave him first, HAHA. Then, we were matched up against each other again in finals, and I got rekt. He took first place lolz
[quote=dulcette]@halfway: I don't know about that changing thing, though. It's not like I know if he's interested in me or not, you know? At the same time, I don't find myself really "looking" for anybody perse, he's just an intriguing person to talk to, HAHA. I'm a big fat nerd, so I compete at speech tournaments. We do the same event, so I met him by competing against him in a round.[/quote] You don't know about the changing thing. I don't know about it either. It's hard to predict if someone is going to change but if they do then that's great. If they don't then you already have your opinion on them so nothing changes. Well, don't leave me hanging! When you competed against one another who won?
Another thing to remember is that if he hasn't really been in a relationship before the way he will respond to certain social cues is pretty unpredictable, such as the cue of being the one to initiate conversation once in a while. While him constantly initiating conversation definitely would be a sign of interest, he may just not know how to do it.
@halfway: I don't know about that changing thing, though. It's not like I know if he's interested in me or not, you know? At the same time, I don't find myself really "looking" for anybody perse, he's just an intriguing person to talk to, HAHA. I'm a big fat nerd, so I compete at speech tournaments. We do the same event, so I met him by competing against him in a round.
Okay, so the thing to keep in mind is that most young guys--especially that avert social technology--tend to be awkward around girls. Him not responding right away or initiating conversations may just be a result of his awkwardness and not be a good sign of his interest. Frustrating, I know. Sorry, this does get better as people mature and learn to interact with others, but at your age, basing interest on this is a mistake.
Just ask him out to a simple date. Maybe a local boba or coffee shop but make it low pressure and non-committal. Unless the guy is a major jerk, this should not be a big deal. Basically be nice and inviting throughout your "date" and things should go well. Don't be afraid to drop hints that you're really interested. Guys tend to be godawful and getting the hint, so you do have to guide them sometimes. Best of luck!
[quote=dulcette]Ah yeah, that's what I've been thinking for a while LOL. I'd really hate for my conversations to be really one-sided, and I'm worried I'm spending my time for someone who doesn't really want ot talk to me. Sometimes he messages in the morning if he falls asleep without replying/saying good-bye. When it was still competition season, he would start a conversation when he was on his way home (kind of died down after a while, though). Honestly, I don't really remember/pay attention to when he starts conversations, HAHA[/quote] I'm curious now! What are you competing in? Also there's no harm in continuing to talk to him but still looking for someone else. He could change the way he's conducting himself into someone more involved with you or he can stay how he is. You haven't made any commitment to him so there's nothing wrong with exploring your options while maintaining conversation with another person who you COULD end up with.
[quote=halfway]This is why I say no. I'm not against people not using technology but if I'm interested in a person and want to bring it out of the friend zone then I think it's pretty important that they use technology if I'm not seeing them day to day or occasionally during the week. The amount of time someone takes to text you back isn't very relevant to me unless it's consistently multiple hours at a time. I am curious about him ever being the one to initiate the text. I'm proud of you to be the one to start the texting but if you're always the one starting it then it seems kinda one sided.[/quote] Ah yeah, that's what I've been thinking for a while LOL. I'd really hate for my conversations to be really one-sided, and I'm worried I'm spending my time for someone who doesn't really want ot talk to me. Sometimes he messages in the morning if he falls asleep without replying/saying good-bye. When it was still competition season, he would start a conversation when he was on his way home (kind of died down after a while, though). Honestly, I don't really remember/pay attention to when he starts conversations, HAHA
[quote=dulcette] The thing is, this person doesn't really use technology often? [/quote] This is why I say no. I'm not against people not using technology but if I'm interested in a person and want to bring it out of the friend zone then I think it's pretty important that they use technology if I'm not seeing them day to day or occasionally during the week. The amount of time someone takes to text you back isn't very relevant to me unless it's consistently multiple hours at a time. I am curious about him ever being the one to initiate the text. I'm proud of you to be the one to start the texting but if you're always the one starting it then it seems kinda one sided.
17 Comments • Newest first
I would say keep talking to him.You can call, you can go to places with him, you can chat my other means. However, look out and talk to other guys you might be interested in.
I was in the same situation, I met my ex-gf during Ultimate Frisbee. Definitely out of my league; matched GPA with valedictorian, level 8 gymanist at age 10 but teaches kids instead as her job, regional water-skiing contender, and the list goes on and on. I was just pretty into Computer Science and planning to stick to Track for life while she could have seriously gone for the Olympics.
Relationship somehow worked out. We texted pretty occasionally but I was for about 3~ months starting and leading conversations. What you should notice is simply how engaged they are in the conversation like what they say. Another thing, I made my intentions pretty clear. First, compliments and friendly flirting but that didn't last for no longer than two or so weeks(if that lol). Some sort of touching or physical contact is a pretty clear sign too and obvious non-friendly flirting; which is what I did.
However, this is from a guy's point of view. I've rarely seen girls be aggresive towards the opposite sex so I would caution on how straight-forward you are. There's definitely still a stigma on females who are too aggresive too soon but not so much for guys in this century. He should make some sort of notification at some point lol, "you're a girl" - RitoPls. Most guys give some sign of affection towards you if they like you unless there are certain personality traits.
definitely holla
[quote=qtwarriorxx9001][/quote]
yeah, probably
[quote=WontPostMuch][/quote]
thanks for the advice and luck!
[quote=RitoPls][/quote]
i guess it's good preparation to be a tree in my next life HAHAH
[quote=Thiefy996][/quote]
LOL no not like a spelling bee it's a bit complicated to explain..
Nearby speech and debate teams from local schools are put together into a "league." Speech competitors go and compete at tournaments hosted by that league, as well as other random ones hosted by schools.
There are different events students can compete in at these tournaments, ranging from debates, interpretation, persuasives, improv, etc. At varsity tournaments, there are 2-3 preliminary rounds, one semi-final round, and a final round for each respective event. In each prelim round, 6-7 competitors competing in the same event are randomly matched up. There, they each take a turn in performing their event--they give speeches, act, etc. A judge is assigned to each round to watch the performances and give placings to the competitors; the standard 1st, 2nd, 3rd, and so on. The placings from prelims are then added up to get a cume, or total, for each competitor. The lowest cumes are picked to advance to semi-finals, where people get eliminated for final rounds. In our case, he and I both competed in improv, an event where you're given 3 topics and 2 minutes to prepare a 5 minute speech about one of the topics. We were just coincidentally matched up our first, semi-final, and final rounds, so we were eventually forced to talk to each other, LOL.
Sorry, I didn't elaborate because I didn't really know how to explain it, since it's a bit difficult to explain. Some of this explanation is probably inaccurate too, 'cause I suck at explaining these things. I hope it makes some sense.
You're a girl.
You literally don't have to do anything.
Guys have to worry about all this. You just sit there and wait.
Well me and my crush have both told each other we kinda dislike texting. So our conversation can be like that too...taking two hours to reply ya know.
Call this guy, ask him out, something. Do something.
do it. just do it
Was this a wrestling competition?
@halfway: I don't think he'd change something he's unaware of, though. We were matched up in a round of 6-7 people and I took first that round, while he took second. We were matched up against each other again in semi-finals that same day, and we got the same placing from the two judges. It was a funny coincidence because the judge that gave me first gave him fifth, while the judge that gave me fifth gave him first, HAHA. Then, we were matched up against each other again in finals, and I got rekt. He took first place lolz
[quote=dulcette]@halfway: I don't know about that changing thing, though. It's not like I know if he's interested in me or not, you know? At the same time, I don't find myself really "looking" for anybody perse, he's just an intriguing person to talk to, HAHA. I'm a big fat nerd, so I compete at speech tournaments. We do the same event, so I met him by competing against him in a round.[/quote]
You don't know about the changing thing. I don't know about it either. It's hard to predict if someone is going to change but if they do then that's great. If they don't then you already have your opinion on them so nothing changes. Well, don't leave me hanging! When you competed against one another who won?
Another thing to remember is that if he hasn't really been in a relationship before the way he will respond to certain social cues is pretty unpredictable, such as the cue of being the one to initiate conversation once in a while. While him constantly initiating conversation definitely would be a sign of interest, he may just not know how to do it.
@halfway: I don't know about that changing thing, though. It's not like I know if he's interested in me or not, you know? At the same time, I don't find myself really "looking" for anybody perse, he's just an intriguing person to talk to, HAHA. I'm a big fat nerd, so I compete at speech tournaments. We do the same event, so I met him by competing against him in a round.
Okay, so the thing to keep in mind is that most young guys--especially that avert social technology--tend to be awkward around girls. Him not responding right away or initiating conversations may just be a result of his awkwardness and not be a good sign of his interest. Frustrating, I know. Sorry, this does get better as people mature and learn to interact with others, but at your age, basing interest on this is a mistake.
Just ask him out to a simple date. Maybe a local boba or coffee shop but make it low pressure and non-committal. Unless the guy is a major jerk, this should not be a big deal. Basically be nice and inviting throughout your "date" and things should go well. Don't be afraid to drop hints that you're really interested. Guys tend to be godawful and getting the hint, so you do have to guide them sometimes. Best of luck!
[quote=dulcette]Ah yeah, that's what I've been thinking for a while LOL. I'd really hate for my conversations to be really one-sided, and I'm worried I'm spending my time for someone who doesn't really want ot talk to me. Sometimes he messages in the morning if he falls asleep without replying/saying good-bye. When it was still competition season, he would start a conversation when he was on his way home (kind of died down after a while, though). Honestly, I don't really remember/pay attention to when he starts conversations, HAHA[/quote]
I'm curious now! What are you competing in? Also there's no harm in continuing to talk to him but still looking for someone else. He could change the way he's conducting himself into someone more involved with you or he can stay how he is. You haven't made any commitment to him so there's nothing wrong with exploring your options while maintaining conversation with another person who you COULD end up with.
[quote=halfway]This is why I say no. I'm not against people not using technology but if I'm interested in a person and want to bring it out of the friend zone then I think it's pretty important that they use technology if I'm not seeing them day to day or occasionally during the week. The amount of time someone takes to text you back isn't very relevant to me unless it's consistently multiple hours at a time. I am curious about him ever being the one to initiate the text. I'm proud of you to be the one to start the texting but if you're always the one starting it then it seems kinda one sided.[/quote]
Ah yeah, that's what I've been thinking for a while LOL. I'd really hate for my conversations to be really one-sided, and I'm worried I'm spending my time for someone who doesn't really want ot talk to me. Sometimes he messages in the morning if he falls asleep without replying/saying good-bye. When it was still competition season, he would start a conversation when he was on his way home (kind of died down after a while, though). Honestly, I don't really remember/pay attention to when he starts conversations, HAHA
yeah if you're always the one to initiate conversation then maybe he's not all that interested.
Plot twist the real prize is you
I'm taking my sweet time replying to this post jay kay
[quote=dulcette] The thing is, this person doesn't really use technology often? [/quote]
This is why I say no. I'm not against people not using technology but if I'm interested in a person and want to bring it out of the friend zone then I think it's pretty important that they use technology if I'm not seeing them day to day or occasionally during the week. The amount of time someone takes to text you back isn't very relevant to me unless it's consistently multiple hours at a time. I am curious about him ever being the one to initiate the text. I'm proud of you to be the one to start the texting but if you're always the one starting it then it seems kinda one sided.