General

Hate clock joke

I pass away and go to heaven (assuming this is possible since I'm certain heaven has blacklisted me by default). Upon arrival, I notice an endless wall of clocks with the hands constantly moving. I ask God what all those clocks are, and he says "Those are hate clocks. Each one is assigned to everyone on Earth. Whenever someone gets hated, the hands on the clock move. People get hated all the time, hence the hands are always moving. But some people are special. Some people's clocks such as Hitler's and Osama's are being used as ceiling fans."

So I look in the directory to find my hate clock, and notice that it's not on the wall. I ask God where my hate clock is, and he responds with "Your clock is at the nearby sawmill. It's being used as a circular blade to cut lumber. Now get the hell out of my sanctuary."

It's funny because it's true!