I dont know how to start it
so I'll just begin by rambling. I guess there's a girl for whom I have a few feelings. See, it's strange because I never thought I would like her in that way, but overtime as we worked together on various instrumental/vocal performances, we grew closer. At any rate, as we won several competitions together at various festivals, I don't know why but I liked her more and more; I loved spending time with her. You know how you catch yourself sometimes smiling throughout a whole 2 hour long chat with someone? Funny how that works but I can't believe I found myself doing it. Typical things like that -- that's how I knew that I was pretty much infatuated at least with her. However, I realized nothing would ever come of it because she graduated this year and I'm one year younger. Sucks, but I guess it's better for me not to get attached now than getting in a relationship (assuming she has some reciprocated feelings) and then breaking it off as the school year starts right?
Then just yesterday, someone brought up an interesting point, asking "do you think you'll find someone this amazing" and I realized the chances that I will are incredibly slim. You might be thinking "yeah right there are a lot of fish in the sea" or something along the lines of that. But realistically, I don't think I will. On a purely statistical basis, she's one of the best singers in the US (we're talking Juilliard), going to a HYPS school (I won't specify which for security reasons or whatever). Yeah -- I really don't think I'll find someone quite that amazing with such a kind temperament. Here I'd go on about how great she is and actually have before, but for the sake of your reading, I won't -- but trust me, she's stunning in her character as well as her looks.
I could go after her now (which is impractical as we're both pretty rational and not very impulsive people), or I could wait till college. And also, I don't think the college thing is THAT big of a deal -- I mean ideally I'd go where she's going but 1) it's bad to base such a life-changing decision on a potential relationship that might not even come to fruition and 2) there's never a guarantee for an ivy-league. But because my brother was admitted to an HYPS and I'm going along the same course and doing the same/more than he did, I think I'll be okay as far as college admissions go. And please, no I'm not trying to be arrogant here, I'm just trying to show you guys the details of my situation to show that a future is possible.
At any rate, I don't really know what my question is but I sure as hell know how I feel about her, and would dearly appreciate any serious advice anyone here has if you were in my situation.
Thanks in advance!
20 Comments • Newest first
@AmyrIin I'm an advocate of acting as soon as possible and not waiting. If you wait there are tons of variables that can happen and it also greatly increases the chance that she'll meet another guy. If you wait until she's at university how do you know she won't meet someone there? If she's really as amazing as you describe her to be then she's going to have guys going after her left and right. It happens all the time, people wait too long and the person they have feelings for moves on and/or meets someone else, don't let that be you!
And plus she also doesn't even know she's suppose to be waiting for you since she doesn't know how you feel about her, that's why at the very least you should tell her how you feel, you don't have to jump into a relationship right away or anything but at least you'll get a response from her and then go from there.
@assumptions2: well all those colleges on the east coast are like a couple hours apart lool but I really would love to spend time with her. Even if not as a relationship, at least as a duo for performances -- we really we great.
@TrueAtheist: However, if i wait, don't we have a better shot or it working seeing as we'll be going to the same university for the next couple years? what i mean is, neither of us thinks it's a good idea to start one now with ANYONE. realistically it's just stupid. if I asked right now ofc I'd be shot down it's just not practical.
All I can say is don't do something you're going to regret, or rather don't do nothing. You could just keep going along the way you are leaving things as they are and you may find something better or different. But if you just pass this up without even just a LITTLE indication of where it might head you may (in a few months, years from now) regret not at least finding out why may have happened. Sorry...sounds kind of weird but I am speaking as someone who took a chance and not regretted doing it.
Tell her how you feel.. you have nothing to lose. If she feels the same way then you guys can make it work and you can actually talk to her about it instead of wondering, if she says no then you haven't lost anything you're still in the same spot as you are now and in fact you've gained something because you'd know not to waste your time.
@Amyrlin Of course you shouldn't base what school you go to on her; go to whichever is best for you. But, I don't think going to different universities should stop you from trying to make it work with her (assuming they aren't extremely far apart)
[quote=assumptions2]@Amyrlin In that case, I guess you should wait and see what universities you both get into.
If you both go to the same university, chase that girl, OP.[/quote]
definitely. But another thing is, I don't want to base my college decision in any way on her -- I don't know. Maybe a little bit, but I don't think that's a wise future decision.
we'll both forsure get into great universities (she already has lol), but the differences in undergraduate education and treatment varies, and I don't want to invest in her if it's a dead end. I'm like doubting and I know I need to take a risk for stuff to work out, but I mean rationally I don't like putting all my eggs in the same basket.
Go for it, see if it works out well, and then decide whether you want to keep it going through college or not.
@Amyrlin In that case, I guess you should wait and see what universities you both get into.
If you both go to the same university, chase that girl, OP.
[quote=assumptions2]@Amyrlin I let her go. We went to the same university, and I talked to her, but didn't mention that I had feelings for her or anything. Months passed, and one day, I got really drunk, and thought it would be a good idea to call her, and confess my love for her over the phone (it wasn't a good idea). She met me that night, and we talked. I was really drunk, but she basically said she was into me before, but she didn't want to make the first move, and that she's going out with some guy.
I think you should go for it. There's a chance that she likes you, and she's not going to wait forever.[/quote]
fact of the matter is though, I don't want to start something and if we went to different universities, that would suck!
If I went to the same one, then awesome, 1 year difference, and that's handlable. But I mean what if I went to another one? Then just break it off?
@Amyrlin I let her go. We went to the same university, and I talked to her, but didn't mention that I had feelings for her or anything. Months passed, and one day, I got really drunk, and thought it would be a good idea to call her, and confess my love for her over the phone (it wasn't a good idea). She met me that night, and we talked. I was really drunk, but she basically said she was into me before, but she didn't want to make the first move, and that she's going out with some guy.
I think you should go for it. There's a chance that she likes you, and she's not going to wait forever.
[quote=assumptions2]I know exactly how you feel, OP.[/quote]
What do you plan on doing?
@HannahMontanas: @IGotModded: @Cxaxukluth: Why not wait maybe until college acceptances, and if we end up at the same college, only then get reacquainted -- until then, I guess just keep the vibe alive? or something
[quote=123tonyni]no basiler is gonna read a long post unless its useful sir. didn't read[/quote]
Lol, it's not even that long. Lazy bum.
go for ittt
#yolo
go for it
I know exactly how you feel, OP.
[quote=123tonyni]no basiler is gonna read a long post unless its useful sir. didn't read[/quote]
I read it just to spite you.
[url=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=efc6t7Pslow]Solution to your problems[/url]
Said someone's interesting point is not so interesting. It's not so unlikely you'll find someone more interesting than this girl. That said, there's no hurt in pursuing something with her. If it doesn't work out, so be it, but if either way you'll probably have a good time.
no basiler is gonna read a long post unless its useful sir. didn't read
Go for the woman before someone else does.
She might even get some BBC if you don't go for it tho