Why do most girls never text guys first?
I've been texting this girl that I like and I'm usually always the one who has to initiate the conversation, or else, I probably won't hear from her again. Whenever I text her first, she always responds almost instantly, and she's always up for my plans whenever I ask her if she wants to hang out. But why is it that you girls never like to be the first to text a guy, even if you want to talk to them?
Girls, do you usually like being texted first, or are you okay with texting them first? If you like being the ones texted first, why is that? Do you girls just not want to feel like you're too clingy and that you might scare them off? Are you just not interested in texting the guy?
Guys, are you usually in the same position as me where you will always have to text the girl first or you won't ever hear from them again? Do you get irritated by this, or do you personally not mind being the one to initiate the conversation with a girl?
Edit: Sorry, I do occasionally text other girls first too, and when I asked my friend, she said , "girls never text guys first, it's the guys that should always text first." I don't completely understand the reasoning behind this..
16 Comments • Newest first
don't really care who texts first now but back when I was young and insecure the only reason why I didn't text first was because I thought I'd come off too clingy
if I'm not interested in the guy I either just not reply at all or act extremely distant and give one worded replies and reject any attempt they have at wanting to hang out. so I think the girl is into you she's just kind of old fashioned, I'm sure that when you two start getting closer she'll feel more comfortable with texting you first
"I don't care, I text whoever, whenever I want"
and that's me
I've never had a boy text me first, I'm always the one to take the initiative when I like someone enough. If they're just a friend then I always figure it's courtesy for the person who asked the other person's number to text first (if I ask someone for their number then I am the one who should text first and vice versa)...and from then on texting first is fair game. If I don't like the person and I don't really wanna talk to them I won't ever text first
societal expectations
anxiety about talking
being uninterested
not being on their phones all the time
not sure how to start a conversation
generally not thinking of talking to you as an option
I mean you like her so technically you're the one pursuing. When she likes you and is in pursuit of you she might text first. Remember, if the feeling is mutual, there will always be one pursing the other.
If she's playing hard to get, play with her. Hohoho!
I normally let the girls do the texting/convo-initiation because when I attempt to start a convo, I normally don't get responses, I get one-word responses, or something of the sort.
Meh.
Just because she doesn't text first doesn't mean she's uninterested in you. Some girls claim that they don't text first because they think it looks too desperate.
i got over myself a few years ago and i text guys first if i have an interest in them. i think it should be a balance between the two because you'll always feel discouraged and feel annoying to the person if you text that person first so much.
Well if I really do want to talk to a person I would try to initiate a conversation first with my -cough- superb -cough- conversing skills.
I believe it's different for everyone, you can't just generalize that all girls don't text first.
It may be just socially awkward people, like myself, that can't seem to make/start conversations.
Some people might think that they're bothering the other person so do not usually try to be the one to initiate conversations.
Obviously being texted first is nice as it shows that the other person actually wants to talk with you.
One of my female friends never texts me first. I have to be the one who initiates the conversation. It gets a bit irritating, I admit that.
I think it depends on the girl. You have a valid observation but it only pertains to one girl you happen to like.
If a girl is really interested in you, she'll text you first 10 times out of 10. I've met attractive girls that always initiated the conversation and I've met average looking girls where I have to text them first. I'd say girls tend to play the "hard to get" persona most of the time though. Like I said, it really depends on the girl on how she's feeling you.
Advice: if you really like this girl, like if you feel she's girlfriend material or even a girl you could see a future relationship with, man up and text her first. Trust me; girls love guys who take charge.
I'd prefer to be texted/called first because I'm bad at starting a convo cause I don't know what to say.
My closest girl friend and I text each other almost equally, about 60/40. She's the type of person who's friends with everyone she meets, so I'd say that's a great ratio.
You might be a boring texture, or maybe she's shy or just isn't big into texting. I wouldn't care if I had to initiate every text with a girl I liked, as long as she isn't just answering questions, like she's not interested
I think you're generalizing here'
you gave one example and then described it as "most girls"
Girls are an enigma that's why.