Boys, what would your reaction be to this approach?
I have a huge crush on this guy, we've only met 2-3 times but he's uber cute and our very few conversations always spark an interest for me (we talk about similar music and anime taste <3 ). Around my area not many people watch anime.
We have a mutual friend and she's known him for a long time, she says that he's never really had a girl approach him that isn't a skank and that he's never been in a serious relationship. He's 22, I'm 19. She said that she was going to "hook" us up, but she's lagging it and I just waaaant him already.
Also I followed him on instagram and he followed back, almost instantly! But I don't think it matters that much anyway, I'm just really proud that he followed me back.
Now, here's what I want your input on, boys-
A girl you barely know, messages you saying something along the lines of "hi, I think you're cute."
Not really anything else, no "I want to hang out" or "I want to get to know you." Simply just stating that she's attracted to you.
If she wasn't attractive, how would you react? If she was attractive, what would you do?
Edit-
Unattractive as in someone you are not physically attracted to, attractive as in someone you are physically attracted to
22 Comments • Newest first
If I was attracted to you I would compliment you back, if I wasn't attracted to you I would say thanks but not compliment you back.
Dude, if he likes you that'd be heaven for him. If not he would be pretty passive about the whole thing. I'm pretty sure most guys are like that.
Girls don't understand this, but it's either a win or a "neutral" if you just told guys you like them. It is much less of a complication to guys, unlike girls who always overthink it and all that crap.
Just do it, please, for the sake of yourself and that guy. It'll be fine.
BTW tell us what happens.
EDIT: idk about doing it over Facebook though. Guys tell other guys that it's wimpy to do that to a girl, but I don't know if it's the same for girls.
[quote=Radiqal]If she wasn't attractive, I'd probably say thanks and proceed to move her to the friend zone.
If she's attractive but i'm not immediately interested in her, I'd probably just talk to her and see if my feelings change along the line.
If she's attractive and I like her, i'd probably get all super excited and put dat mac on her.[/quote]
this is pretty much it.
"No I don't think so."
That's what I would say.
If I didn't like you I'd probably be like "Lol thanks" or just say nothing at all. If I like'd you / thought you were cute I'd probably say thanks and make a move.
But I'm a bit of a player so
@Missy: I wouldn't just jump into a relationship with you. I'd probably make you my friend first and then go from there.
Y'know, figure out your personality and quirks...
not attractive: "thanks"
attractive: "cut the crap and bang me immediately"
Not attractive: "Thanks. I don't get that very often xP"
Attractive: "Thanks bae xP I find u attractive 2 )"
I have an extremely long response to this because there's tons of different situations and conditions that might be involved, but I'll give my general response: If this were to happen to me (which it has), then I'd probably hit on her with a compliment even better/smoother if I'm attracted to her. However, if I'm not attracted to her, I still want her to know I appreciate the kind words, while also adding in some other smooth talk. I sense that you're trying to get a read on if he finds you attractive or not, so i'll just say this much: if he just said "thanks" or "I think you are too", that PROBABLY means he's not physically attracted to you. But if he was doing the whole "mister steal yo girl" routine, then he probably likes you too. OVERALL (sorry for the long response after all lol), the guy has to respond with a smooth response/compliment that isn't too aggressive, or else it'll already make a nervous girl even more nervous.
Why don't you just add him on facebook and talk to him on there?
Or start dming him selfies of yourself on IG?
Or get his snapchat and talk there?
If you had good conversations before he'll probably want to talk some more.
Just casually flirt with him.
If you come on too strong, you'll most likely scare him away.
It's super easy to cut off ties with someone you really only know of online, so running away is a very favorable option in that situation.
If the flirting goes well, then there you go.
If they're cute, i'd say the same back, or just say thanks.
[quote=Radiqal]If she wasn't attractive, I'd probably say thanks and proceed to move her to the friend zone.
If she's attractive but i'm not immediately interested in her, I'd probably just talk to her and see if my feelings change along the line.
If she's attractive and I like her, i'd probably get all super excited and put dat mac on her.[/quote]
If you were in the same situation as me (but as the guy), you know having talked to this girl very few times about things you both have in common, and sort of connecting more than acquaintances would, would you be interested in this girl?
I mean I don't think I'm unattractive, I'm above average if anything and I like to think that I dress nice.
I'm just helllaa insecure about approaching guys because I've never done it over the internet, usually I'm way more confident in real life. I don't get to see my crush often since we don't go to the same school or anything, so really I can't speak to him in real life without speaking with him online first.
I think there are better lines to say than that, "cute" isn't exactly the word you want to be using as it doesn't really express your attraction to him directly, there are different interpretations for the word, at least that's how it is over here. If she isn't someone I'm attracted to then I'd return with a kind thanks and most likely leave it there, if she was someone I'm interested in then I'd do the same but try to continue a conversation.
invite him to a weeb convention
"Oh lol. I don't get that very often. Thanks"
If I don't find her attractive, I leave it at that.
If I do, I return the compliment.
Well, I don't think you should say "I think you're cute" straight off. You should ask to hang out and then maybe give him a few hints while you guys are on a "date".
As for attractive/unattractive, I personally wouldn't care. This sounds like a lie but I'm being honest. BUT, depends how unattractive a girl is...if she's just average, I would give her a chance, if she's attractive...that's a bonus? I think personality matters more, a hot girl with an ugly personality is a turn-off. An average girl with a great personality is a win. Someone that's unattractive...if we click and she's genuinely a nice person, why not? Looks will deteriorate but personality will not (hopefully ). You can't get more cliche than me
And as many people stated above, attractiveness is subjective. I have no idea what you mean by unattractive, could be really ugly or average.
If she wasn't attractive, how would you react? i'd say "thank you, you're very kind"
If she was attractive, what would you do? i'd say "thank you, you're very kind"
I'm in a relationship so i would do nothing. If i was the guy in your scenario, it would depend whether on whether or not i liked you. If i did, i would ask you out, if i didn't i would just say thank you and that'd be it.
It all depends on if he's looking for a relationship. If I were him, I'd start off slow, and as time progresses, I may end up adapting feelings towards you.
[quote=1RedWhip]Depends on your definition of not attractive.[/quote]
Everyone knows "attractive" is a subjective term. What you find attractive I may not.
It would depend on the personality of the guy and how much he likes you back.
If he looking for a short term hook-up, he will respond positively back to your messages. If he is serious about liking you back and wants a relation, then he will make a move granted that you give him good and specific hints. If he doesn't like you back, then he will ignore it.
I think most guys would say thanks if you are attractive or not just because you're giving them a compliment and compliments are always nice. If you do plan to message him along the lines of "hi, I think you're cute" you should add something to it such as "we should hangout some time, I think you're cute" that way he has something to go off of instead of a possible awkward "thank you" and you'll have nothing to really say to that. It's really nice when a girl states that she's attracted to you instead of acting like she is and the guy not actually knowing if he's over thinking it or she's really into him so at least you've made it easier for him.
If she wasn't attractive, I'd probably say thanks and proceed to move her to the friend zone.
If she's attractive but i'm not immediately interested in her, I'd probably just talk to her and see if my feelings change along the line.
If she's attractive and I like her, i'd probably get all super excited and put dat mac on her.