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i have a burning hate for my brother

so im 17 and my brother is 19. Heres my context, at this stage in my life, i feel i am equal or should be considered equally in the family, meaning no favouritism in the household. However, my brother is one of those self centred scum bag. What i mean is this, he doesn't care about anyone else but himself, and when you combine this trait with laziness, it means that he leaves things around the house and doesn't give a damn about it. However, that's not the worst part...he eats all the food in the house, now im actually somewhat considerate, so i actually think about sharing and considering other peoples needs etc. But for him..if you don't eat the food within a day or two, he will take it, and he will do it discretely when everyone else is asleep and he would be the only one awake...so sometimes you dont even realise that its gone. A thing about me as well is, i hate judgemental people, so when im eating dinner and theres something that he wants but theres not enough of, he will judge how much of the portion i take and then he always feels the need to take just as much as me or more coz he's somehow special has the mentality of "if he's eating that much, im eating that much or a bit more coz i dont give a S***" I know some of you guys think, oh brothers always do this to each other and fight etc...but we don't talk to each other at all...once i move out of my house, i am quite certain that i will never talk to him again, if he gets married, i probably wouldn't want to go to his wedding. Seriously what do i do...

September 1, 2015

20 Comments • Newest first

caracal

i understand your frustration, but these issues are honestly incredibly petty. tell him those things bother you. tell him to stop. some people don't get the hint, so you need to be more explicit and communicate your feelings directly. confront him, and if he doesn't change, develop some emotional maturity yourself and learn to let these things go. you'll have a chance to be independent soon enough. gain a little more experience in the world outside your bubble and realize that you aren't entitled to anything. work for your own, work on your own.

Reply September 2, 2015
simaini

you guys are still pretty young. only time will tell if you guys will eventually become best friends or whatever. some siblings hate each other but when they grow up and mature, they become really close

Reply September 2, 2015
nattl532

it may sound small because im only listed a few things, he's basically bullied me my whole life, for instance:
- when im watching something, he'll walk in and say something along the lines of "this show sucks, its all fake"
- when im about to take a shower and need to get a towel, he'll go in there as i go away
- he thinks that when i puts something on the tv planner, he thinks hes entitled to watch it coz its on the planner, and when im watching something at that time, he'll start being violent and block the tv or take the card out of the tv box so i cant watch anything...etc
i know these things may sound dumb, but given that ive really done nothing to him, his actions are unjustified and thats what p*sses me off

Reply September 2, 2015
Tyrantblade

Yeah your brother may not bethe best brother, he sounds far from it, but it could be much worse

He could be like my oldest brother, a good for nothing crackhead that would rob his family blind so he could do drugs his whole life if he could

Thankfully hes doing his own thing now and will probably never be in my state again (NY) or in the state id like to move back to (FL) because in the former he has an extensive criminal record and last thing he did in this state was steal a bunch of stuff from a store ($100s of dollars of stuff), and in the latter he owes a small (increasing) fortune of child support

Reply September 2, 2015
Dorks

u need some distance
ik my sister who is 20 yrs older than me started to piss me off around the time i turned 16 so from then til before i went to college. i either stayed behind at school or had an internship where i didn't have to go home or depend on her
our relationship is rly good now or at least i respect her a lot more than when i used to

Reply September 1, 2015
Lotis

i feel bad whilst im reading this.... my brothers 11 and im 13

Reply September 1, 2015
Omegathorion

So... have you tried talking to him about it?

Reply September 1, 2015
ShammyShakes

you're 17 going on 18 time to man up boy

Reply September 1, 2015
Toyled

That seriously sounds like my older brother.
You're 16, try to apply for a job and get time away from the house.
Keep a thing in mind, no matter how mad you get at family, they're always your family.
You're going to have to accept the fact that you're related.

Reply September 1, 2015
besel

[quote=0kevqn]You sound like my mom. Stop being so upset over little things, and if you don't want him eating your food, put your name on it[/quote]

i doubt a name tag is going to stop him lol

Reply September 1, 2015
PsikoXD

I'm guessing you live with your family and not only your brother.
Is it food you've bought or food your parents have bought?
If the latter, then it's not your problem, if it's food you've bought yourself, get a mini fridge for your room if you feel teritorial about it.

At age 17 it's probably normal to feel the way you do, like the rest of your family is "slowing you down" or being annoying so don't worry about it.
When you get a little older it'll be different and your brother will change.

Spend time out of the house, hang out with your friends, I mean your 17, I was never home at that age lol.

Reply September 1, 2015
Colour

wen wil u ngz lern

Reply September 1, 2015 - edited
kevqn

You sound like my mom. Stop being so upset over little things, and if you don't want him eating your food, put your name on it

Reply September 1, 2015 - edited
AllKorean

Why don't you just wait it out? If he is that lazy and eats everything, just waiting for obesity or letting him choke on his own vomit sounds like a better or heavier outcome in the long run, but In my opinion your parents probably have the same mentality as you do, they'll to do something about it like kicking him out or giving him a options to change his life.

Reply September 1, 2015 - edited
Effinjoog

^ Agreed. It doesn't seem like a reason to hate your sibling the way you seem too. You only get one brother. There should be very little they can do short of abusing you physically that should make you hate them enough to not go to their wedding. You may not think this way now but I guarantee there will come a time you will think back to this stuff and feel like it was a dumb reason to get mad. My sister was like this and we hardly talked when we were younger. Once you get out on your own there may come a time you will need advice or help and your siblings will be the first person to go for this, even if it seems awkward to ask at first.

Reply September 1, 2015 - edited
WindowLegs

these plebs aint loyal. You only have to live with the plebs for a small amount of time. Become a twitch sensation, move in with sodapoppin, reckful and nmp or go and live with Mitch Jones

Reply September 1, 2015 - edited
HolyDragon

You'll just have to live with it.

Some families will have siblings who are distant
Some will be close

You can cut all contact with him once you have more control over your life.

From what I've gathered purely from your text
He's an immature idiot.

In my family, I always take my younger siblings out for food or pay for outside food.
I'm just not interested in eating by myself.

Reply September 1, 2015 - edited
mumbhaki

spoon/buttfvk him while sleeping...make him feel who da real alpha male.

Reply September 1, 2015 - edited