General

How to Win at life

In most movies we see today (and the past), the protagonist always jump into dangerous situations and somehow makes his/her way out. This makes us wonder.. Just how? after all the BS they went through, how did they do it? What the heck was going on in their head that got them to where they were? It was like as if they knew the future. They confidently strut along the their life as if anything were to happen, they know how to handle and overcome it.

Whether it be Harry Potter, Andy from the Shawshake redemption, Peter Quill from the new movie Guardians of the galaxy, Michael Corleone from The Godfather, Woody and buzz from Disney's classic Toy Stoy, etc... One thing they have in common is Charisma, confidence, and leadership skills.

If you have all these skills, you can let this be a review or skip over to another thread. If you find that you are lacking in these skill, well i have good news for YOU. [b] ALL OF YOU. EVERYONE ONE OF YOU [/b] - have what it takes to acquire these skills. In this thread, i will show you how you can accomplish this with the help of anecdotes. However, there are requirements. If you can fulfill these, you are golden.

[b] Requirements [/b]
- Willing to accept change - This will be a new life style or to some, an addition to others (The way you view yourself, goals, and dreams as of now will remain the same so technically, you are still the same person after learning these techniques) Just like how every class in maple is able to pick up skills without changing their jobs, you will pick up skills without changing who you are. Think of this as your job advancement and you have a new skill set.
- Have an open mind to things.
- Willing to practice these techniques in everyday life

[b] I will add to this thread over time simply because there is too much. However, i will give you guys my best. [/b]
This is a very lengthy thread and i wished there was a TLDR version. However, a TLDR doesnt carry the same message as well as the TL version so please bare with me.

[b] Past guides [/b]
About 3 years ago, I wrote a guide for guys on basil once on [url=http://www.basilmarket.com/forum/2179209/0/How_To_Get_Girls.html]getting girls[/url]. However, it was meant to teach how teenage boys hook up or start a relationship with teenage girls so if youre over 21 dont read it. It probably would not work for girls around your age. Most people thought it helped and others agreed. Had a few skeptics but you can tally them off with 5 fingers.

[b] Little about me [/b]
My name is Wei and i currently attend a university studying bio-chemistry and moving on to grad school in about two years. English is my second language so i apologize for any grammar mistakes i will/have make/made. If you are uncertain about something, mail me and i'll do my best to help you out. Hopefully this thread does not get locked before i get to finish it. It will take a while and please hang on with me as i show you how to win at life.

[header] Contents [/header]

[b] Chapter 1 - Dealing with people [/b]
- Fundamental rule when dealing with someone
-If you do this, you can have the world behind your back
[b] Chapter 2 - How to make everyone you meet like you [/b]
[b] Chapter 3 - How to impress someone [/b]
[b] Chapter 4 - How to get people to do what you want them to do [/b]
[b] Chapter 5 - How to be a leader and change people at your bend [/b]
[b] Chapter 6 - How to read people's senses and personality [/b]
[b] Chapter 7 - How to connect with someone instantly [/b]
[b] Chapter 8 - How to connect with someone completely different from you [/b]
[b] Chapter 9 - Making good impressions [/b]
[header] Chapter 1 - Dealing with people [/header]

[b] Fundamental rule when dealing with people [/b]

----- In the past, we've all been punished before. whether or not, it is physical punishment or verbal punishment, we know it agitate us. Honestly, will we learn from it? Even with slavery, people are forced to do things through sheer physical punishment. Eventually, that made things ugly for the near future. I'm not sure how much of you guys know this man but he is named B.F Skinner. He is a world famous physiologist that proved animals who were rewarded for good behavior learned a lot more faster than animals that were punished for bad behavior. Soon enough, it was the same with human beings.

---- A safety worker that goes by the name George B. Johnston of Enid, Oklahoma recently found that some of his workers were not wearing their safety helmets. When he scold at them telling that its the rules and they MUST follow it or they lose their jobs, the workers would put their hats on. However, once he left, they immediately took it off. Where did he go wrong? Well its quite obvious. So one day, when he approached his workers, they all tilted their heads up from the group and stared blankly at him waiting for him to yell at him. To his worker's surprise, George asked them if the hard hats were uncomfortable or were they not their size. The workers all gave a puzzled face and just said that it was fine. Gorge then said in a calm passive voice, "There are times it gets dangerous in here at any given moment and those hats are meant to protect you from that". A few hours later, Gorge saw his Workers from a distance and to his surprise, he saw that each and everyone one of them had a hard hat on.

----- We all easily recognize that verbal punishment is bad as we saw in the last example. However, there are a lot of times we fail to recognize that we ourselves give out verbal punishments. How exactly? i mean most of you guys are reasonable people and probably think it's wrong to yell at people like that. However, most of us do it at a subconscious level. We criticize.

----- What good comes out of criticizing? It is basically telling someone their faults. Yeah our parents tend to tell us that we are bad at this and that. We know they are trying to make you realize what you are doing is wrong. We dont like it but we suck it up only because they are our parents. But what if they arent our parents? Like a friend telling you that you are slow at running. First thing that sparks up in our mind is that they don't know you. In your defense, you couldve had a leg injury or you dont run as much as them. Bottom line, they judged you and youre now in an uncomfortable position. But thats one thing that defines you. They dont tell you how to change your life. If you want to run faster then make adjustments to run faster. But what if you dont want to make adjustments?

----- "I've spent the best years of my life giving people the lighter pleasures, helping them have a good time, and all i get is abuse, the existence of a hunted man." Whoever said this must sound like a very nice person. But why is he hunted? Turns out, the man who said this was none other than the most ruthless notorious public enemy- Al Capone. He did not see himself as a bad man. Infact, he saw himself as someone that helps the public, yet he is judged and hated throughout. To him, he did nothing wrong. Just like to other people, they do not condemn themselves as a bad person.

----- We've all seen criticism everywhere. Especially with playing Maplestory. There are multiple threads and posts talking about how people hide the fact that they play maple-story to avoid criticism. Some of you might have experienced it once before where you say you play maple but someone goes "Eww, maplestory". In your mind, you know that you enjoy playing maple and theres nothing wrong with it. They can tell you that its a kids game but by that point, their rapport with you has already dropped and you stamp them as a judgmental ayHo. I'm sure you dont want others to stamp you as one as well. However, that is your choice to make and it is completely within your control.

[b] If you do this, you can have the world behind your back [/b]

----- There are many ways to making someone do something you want them to do. You can stick a gun up their mouths but how consistent can we be with that? We can't just go around sticking guns up people's holes and expect to be okay with it. Well, we can. but this chapter isn't to teach you how to threaten. As we read in the last chapter, punishment is not the way to go when dealing with people. Instead the only way get what you want, is to give what they want. What do people want? What is one fundamental thing everyone [b]CRAVES[/b] for?

----- According to John Dewey, the "deepest" philosopher of American history, claims that the most fundamental need of anyone is the sense of feeling important. There are many ways of going obtaining this. Some people discover stuff just to get their name out there (like this year nobel prize winners Francois Englert and Peter W. Higgs) some people get it through being the first to accomplish something, and some just tries to make others sympathize with them. It is what drives us to do what we do. Take Inmatesearch along with the top 5 of maple's GM for example. They saw an opportunity to feel important and that is what they exactly did. I'm sure many of us are not able to hit 250 (at least during this era of maple) like them, but we have other ways to feel important. For example, we go the extra mile to be on our crush's/gf/bf good side. Why? So that they notice us and we feel important.

----- What if we don't give people that sense of importance? What happens then? Well, they either try hard enough until you notice them or just find some other way to feel important. For example, you're a male and your GF feels un important to your eyes. If you're lucky, she'll tell you and you can pull yourself out of that hole. However, if she doesnt, theres a good chance of break up or you being cheated on. Most guys blame girls for being unloyal but truth is, one of the biggest reasons why they cheat is because they feel like they can get it from someone else. What if you gave your girl some sort of appreciation? Things may have been better.

----- Have you ever turned on the TV to a movie where a robber says "IM ______ REMEMBER MY NAME!". The guy who started this was none other than the infamous american gangster from the 1920's John Dillinger. Everytime he robbed someplace, he makes sure the police can see him before he vanishes just so he can say "I'm not going to hurt you, but i'm Dillinger!". That was his sense of importance which was what drove him to do the things he did.

----- Now taking it to the extreme, Others would go insane from a lack of appreciation. In a physiological case in the 1920's where a lady was missing sexual gratification from her husband. She wanted children and attention. However, the husband never gave it to her. Back then, divorces are as common as todays so she stuck with him. Soon enough, she fell into insanity where in her own world, she had kids and a perfect life. Her psychologist tried to help her but the lady was already too deep into her insanity.

----- If a lack of appreciation can drive someone insane or distrust, think of what a bit of appreciation can do. A man recognized this in 1897 and made it one of his secret in handling people. Today, his net worth is 336 billion dollars. This man was John D. Rockerfeller. When one of his parthners named [url=http://www.edwardtbedfordfoundation.org/founder.html] Edward T. Bedford [/url] lost him 1 million dollars due to a bad buy of a firm, his first instincts was to criticize. Rockerfeller was a smart man. He knew that criticizing woudn't really do much and it was out of Edwards control. So instead, he did the unthinkable. He congratulated Bedford that even though it was bad buy, it did save his firm some money.

----- The first person who was ever paid a salary higher than a million dollars was the president of steel industry known as United states Steel company. This person also knew about the power of appriciation. This person's name was Charles Schwab. Even his workers knew more about the steel industry than he did but why him? When asked in an interviewed, Schwab claims "The way to develop the best that is in a person is by appreciation and encouragement. There is nothing else that so kills the ambitions of a person as criticisms from superiors."

[header]Chapter 2 - How to make everyone you meet like you [/header]

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Thank you all for taking the time to read the huge wall of text. May this help you and any potential obstacles that comes your way. Please Leave feedback below so i know you guys want more of this.